There was a blurb in last week’s “The Week,” about a Washington State motorist who tried to pull a fast one. He was traveling in the carpool lane and had a cardboard cutout of the “most interesting man in the world” riding shotgun. After he was pulled over and given a ticket, the state trooper tweeted: “I don’t always violate the HOV lane law… but when I do, I get a $124 ticket.”
Here are a few of my favorite “most interesting man” quotes:
The circus ran away to join him. He gave his own father “The talk.” He once went to a psychic, to warn her. Superman has pajamas with his picture on them. He has never waited 15 minutes after finishing a meal before returning to the pool. Sharks have a week dedicated to him. His business card simply says “I’ll Call You.” He was disqualified after winning the Tour-de-France for riding a unicycle. The Holy Grail is looking for him.
Also from “The Week’s” tabloid section, over in Russia the story goes that a businesswoman was becoming very irritated by all of her daughter-in-law’s, mother-in-law jokes. After a family party at a restaurant, Tatiana Kudinova argued with her daughter-in-law Roxanne about who should pick up the tab for the meal. Afterward Roxanne kept deriding her MIL, calling her a skinflint. So, as you might have guessed, Tatiana hired a hit man to kill her. But he turned out to be an undercover cop so she is spending the next nine years in jail. Those crazy Russians.
The Masters will have finished by the time this comes out. I’m glad Tiger is back. It’s much more exciting when one of the two greatest players of all time tees it up. I know, there are many out there who seem intent on seeing him fail, and believe he’s washed up. Maybe they aren’t paying attention to the fact that less than two years ago he was finishing up the 2013 season with 5 wins and first on the money list with $8,553,439. He won two World Golf Championships that year and came in second in the Fed Ex Cup.
This is also the same guy who was named Player of the Year less than two years ago, for the 11th time, which is a record.
He also won the Vardon Trophy in 2013, for the ninth time; yeah that’s a record too. His record’s list goes on and on.
So for all those “experts” who say he’s finished, I don’t think they know what they’re talking about. But they’ll keep saying it, because that’s what they do. And of course, one day they will be right. Then I’ll get to hear, “I told you so.”
It’s hard to believe that it was 16 years ago this weekend that I sat at Amen Corner on Sunday with Fred, Guy and Claude.
On that day, Woods, too far back to make a charge, hit a shot on #12 right toward the pin, but a gust knocked it into Rae’s Creek. He dropped another Nike in the circle and flipped his wedge delicately. The crowd roared when the ball disappeared into the hole for a bogey.
David Duval was number one in the world that weekend but he was out of contention as well.
The last pairing was Greg Norman and Jose Maria Olazabal, who had last won in 1994, but who had suffered through years of what looked to be a career-ending foot injury. Norman had experienced that unforgettable collapse just three years before. He would not have enough in ’99 either, and at the end of the day had to watch as Olazabal put on his second Green Jacket.
Jay Edwards is editor-in-chief of the Hamilton County Herald and an award-winning columnist. Contact him at email@example.com.