Hamilton Herald Masthead

Editorial


Front Page - Friday, August 24, 2012

Are we there yet?




I was lying on my back looking at the ceiling and the faux window with its painted palm leaves and beach beyond. It was a relaxing scene, one that would have likely caused me to drift off, especially if my dentist had thought to put in a CD of gentle waves.

I looked to my left at the blonde nurse, who moved in closer with something called a suction device. On my right was Dr. Fox, my dentist for the past 30 years or so. Then I thought of that “Seinfeld” episode where Jerry was in his dentist’s chair, the Jewish wannabe Tim Whatley. Through his foggy vision, Jerry woke from his nitrous oxide trance to see Whatley and his attractive brunette nurse buttoning up their shirts. It was hilarious, as all those episodes were.

Then it hit me: The actor playing Whatley was Bryan Cranston, who is known better these days as the cancer-ridden chemistry-teaching crystal meth dealer Walter White on AMC’s hit series “Breaking Bad.”

Kathy and I began watching the edgy show from the first episode last weekend at the recommendation of our son Matt. It didn’t take long before we were as addicted as some of the show’s skinny characters.

That would now make my three favorite shows, in no particular order, the one just mentioned, the one where a Miami metro homicide blood-splatter analyst is also a serial killer, and the one where decaying, unreasonable zombies terrorize the countryside. What does this say about me? Plenty, I’m sure, and the kind of things that would likely take months of treatment to reveal.

I’ve always been a fan of the dark side in film, from those early days of Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee and their sharpened canines, to “The Exorcist” in 1974 at the old Center Theater in downtown Little Rock. They’ve brought “The Exorcist” back, you may have heard, to the stage of the Geffen Theater in Los Angeles. I’m not sure how far that projectile vomiting goes, but to be safe, you may not want to sit on the front row. Beauty Brooke Shields plays Chris MacNeil, Regan’s mom. One review of her performance I saw read, “She lends her lines to a B-movie obviousness that cries out for the mystical skills of an acting coach.” Ouch.

•••

I don’t feel sorry for Phoenix, which had nine straight daily highs over 110 degrees. It’s a dry heat. And I don’t feel sorry for Mississippi, which came in at number one as the fattest state in the country. If I were to feel sorry for any state, it would be Colorado, the skinniest. Well, maybe just a little sorry for Mississippi. The ex-Rebels travel to Bama, LSU and Arkansas. They do get UCA on September 1 in a battle of the bears.

•••

Rolling Stone recently listed the 500 greatest albums of all time, and not surprisingly, 60 percent were from the 1960s and ’70s. Truthfully I’m a little surprised the percentage wasn’t higher. Here is the top ten:

10. The Beatles – “The White Album”

  9. Bob Dylan – “Blonde on Blonde”

  8. The Clash – “London Calling”

  7. The Rolling Stones – “Exile on Main Street”

  6. Marvin Gaye – “What’s Going On”

  5. The Beatles – “Rubber Soul”

  4. Bob Dylan – “Highway 61 Revisited”

  3. The Beatles – “Revolver”

  2. The Beach Boys – “Pet Sounds” (really?)

  1. The Beatles – “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”

Which, if you agree at all or somewhat, pretty well cements the boys from Liverpool as the greatest ever. Timeless stuff.

As good as they were, none of their hits made it into the top ten best songs by Rolling Stone. As close as they came was “Imagine” by John Lennon, which was third. Rounding out the top five were: 1) “Like a Rolling Stone” by Bob Dylan; 2) “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction” by The Rolling Stones; 4) “What’s Going On” by Marvin Gaye; and 5) “Respect” by Aretha Franklin.

Lennon would have been 71 had he lived. Dylan is 71, Mick is 69, Keith is 68, Marvin is 73 and Aretha is 70, which lends truth to the old adage, “They don’t make ’em like they used to.”