Hamilton Herald Masthead

Editorial


Front Page - Friday, June 24, 2011

Under Analysis


The long and winding road



Most people don’t understand how difficult it is to be a lawyer. I’m thinking particularly about car choices. You see, for most people, the choice of a motor vehicle has no impact on their business. It’s not that easy when you are a lawyer.

For most of the world, a car choice is based upon price, function and style. The purchaser figures out a budget, calculates their need – whether they are hauling kids, cattle or nothing – and then most find a vehicle that looks good to them. My ex-wife, also a lawyer, was an exception. She didn’t care what the vehicle looked like (maybe, because she knew the car wouldn’t look good for long, anyway, due to her semi-annual car crashes). But then, she was a probate lawyer, concentrating on trustworthiness and dependability. “Dependable” was her code word for new. She didn’t appreciate the vintage cars I drove.

Perhaps there is something about dealing with the affairs of the recently departed that causes a probate lawyer to seek something new and shiny in her personal life.

Like it or not, the car a lawyer drives sends a distinct message to his or her client. The normal considerations of price and function gets sublimated to the requirement that the lawyer must pick the right car for their particular law business. I’m sure you are familiar with the theory that many dogs resemble their owners. Well, lawyers’ cars resemble their law practice.

When I became a lawyer, BMWs were the “in” car for the hip lawyer. Some new lawyers in silk-stocking firms drove cars that were three times nicer than their apartments. But then, different lawyers have different requirements. A few years after graduation, one of my law school classmates bought a Rolls Royce. He thought it would distinguish him from other local lawyers starting their practices. My guess is it worked, and it certainly made an impression on his mechanic who told him he was the only Rolls Royce owner he’d ever known that had a child carrier in the back seat.

Another friend – a plaintiff lawyer – always drove a Cadillac. The fact that it was built in the USA kept the labor unions that were his main source of business, happy. He simply could not drive a “foreign” car. Today, however, the question is more complex. I wonder if my friend can drive a Jeep Grand Cherokee that is now built in Mexico, by Chrysler, which is owned by the Italian automaker Fiat? You are probably starting to see how tough it is to be a lawyer.

Needless to say, old or less expensive cars usually don’t work well for lawyers. Perhaps a first year associate can get away with a Ford Taurus or a Chevy Malibu, but they can’t drive it for too long. On the other hand, if a car is old enough, and unique enough, and if the lawyer is comfortable enough being a little different, he or she might be able to pull it off. Once I was in a law firm that had only six partners. One drove a Porsche, an-other drove a sporty Jaguar, the female partner drove a two-seater Mercedes convertible, the senior-named partner drove a large Mercedes, and the other named partner drove a Ferrari. I drove a very large 1961 turquoise Chevrolet Biscayne. I remember someone coming up to me and saying, “I know what your partners drive and I love you for the car you drive.” Others may have thought differently.

As the firm grew, a new partner started driving a Harley to work. His hair grew into a ponytail and he started wearing lots of leather. When clients began asking if we were doing criminal defense work, he was politely asked to leave.

One of my current partners represents a large group of automobile dealerships. Guess where he buys his cars?

Until recently, I drove a 1987, two door, 5-speed BMW 3 series. I really liked that car. On occasions clients would make a little fun of my favorite car and my new wife grew increasingly unsupportive. Under ex-treme duress, I finally traded for a newer Jaguar (albeit certainly not new). Only then did my partners started pointing out that the car I had been driving was starting to rust out.

At any rate, the lesson is clear. For many lawyers, you are what you drive. I promise, you will never see a hotshot male trial lawyers pull up to federal court in a Prius, and you will never, ever see an environmental lawyer driving a Hummer. Lots of IP lawyers drive Volvos. They are trying to give the impression that they are smarter than the rest of us.

I, myself, still like old cars and drove my 1975 Triumph TR6 to work today. Combined with the Jaguar, these cars might be telling my clients that I have plenty of money to spend on costly foreign auto parts. I’m thinking that my wheels are either going to convince them that I am a creative, out of the box thinker that they desperately need on their legal team, or that I am charging them too much money. As I said, it’s difficult to be a lawyer.

©2011 Under Analysis LLC Mark Levison is a member of the law firm Lathrop & Gage LLP. You can reach Under Analysis LLC in care of this paper or by e-mail at comments@levisongroup.com