Editorial
Front Page - Friday, May 28, 2010
I Swear...
Attention ain’t the same as love
Vic Fleming
Last week, I ventured back in time to a six-year-old column in which tips on love were offered by 5 to 10 year-olds.
Sort of a “Kids Say The Darnedest Things” rip-off.
Judging from the readers’ reaction, you enjoyed it, so here is more of the same:
Ways to make a person
fall in love with you:
“Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores.” (Del, 6)
“Don’t do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain’t the same thing as love.” (Alonzo, 9)
“One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it’s something she likes to eat. French fries usually work for me.” (Bart, 9)
How can you tell
if two adults eating dinner
at a restaurant are in love?
“Just see if the man picks up the check. That’s how you can tell if he’s in love.” (John, 9)
“Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food.” (Brad, 8)
“It’s love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it’s just like how their hearts are on fire.” (Christine, 9)
What most people are thinking when they say “I love you”
“The person is thinking, ‘Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day’.” (Michelle, 9)
How a person learns to kiss:
“You learn it right on the spot when the gushy feelings get the best of you.” (Doug, 7)
“It might help to watch soap operas all day.” (Cairn, 9)
When is it OK
to kiss someone?
“It’s never OK to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you ... That’s why I stopped doing it.” (Jean, 10)
How to make love endure:
“Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work.” (Tom, 7)
“Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash.” (Randy, 8)
The personal qualities
necessary to be a good lover:
“One of you should know how to write a check. Because even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills.” (Ava, 8)
And, in conclusion, a few that are neither categorized nor attributed:
“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.”
“Love is when mommy gives daddy the best piece of chicken.”
“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it every day.”
“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget, and it’s good for them to get reminded.”
Vic Fleming is a district court judge in Little Rock, Arkansas, where he also teaches at the William H. Bowen School of Law. Contact him at vicfleming@
att.net.
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